When children experience traumatic events or challenging circumstances, it can deeply impact their sense of safety and well-being. As caring adults, we play a critical role in helping children process difficult experiences and build resilience. While every child’s healing journey is unique, there are some strategies we can use to support them through trauma.
Being Available without Pushing
Children who have faced trauma often need time and space to process their feelings before opening up. As tempting as it is to try getting them to talk about what happened, forcing the issue can actually shut down communication.
Instead, focus on letting the child know you are available without pressuring them. Spend quality time together, offer affection if they want it, and remind them you are there to listen whenever they feel ready. These actions build trust and help the child feel secure enough to confide in you down the road.
This is especially relevant for children in foster care, such as those fostered with ISP Fostering, who may struggle to form attachments after experiencing neglect or abandonment. Make it clear you will listen without judgment when the child is ready.
Providing Consistency and Rituals
Trauma can leave children feeling unsafe and out of control. Providing structure through predictable routines and rituals can help counteract this. Maintain regular schedules for things like meals, bedtime, chores, etc. Also, create special rituals like reading bedtime stories, taking walks together after school, baking cookies on Saturdays, or anything else meaningful to the child.
The consistency of daily routines and special rituals demonstrates your reliability. It also empowers the child to know what to expect day-to-day. For children in foster care who have experienced disruption, this can promote a much-needed sense of stability.
Encouraging Creative Expression
Expressing emotions creatively can enable healing for traumatised children who do not feel comfortable talking directly about their experiences. Provide opportunities for creative activities like art, music, dance, creative writing, or imaginative play.
Focus praise on the child’s efforts and creations rather than demanding they disclose any meanings behind them. Traumatised children may encode their feelings symbolically in their creative work without consciously intending to.
Monitoring Changes in Behaviour
Trauma can manifest through challenging behaviours in children, like aggression, hyperactivity, withdrawal, clinginess, trouble focusing, etc. While addressing problem behaviours is important, it is equally important not to shame or judge the child. Their actions may be an unconscious way of expressing distress or asserting control.
If you notice behavioural changes lasting more than a few weeks, explore options like therapy that can help children learn to cope with and process their trauma in healthier ways. For foster children especially, new problematic behaviours may indicate an unmet need. Work on getting to the root cause through patient listening.
Helping traumatised children heal is a gradual process requiring patience and compassion. By providing safety, consistency, and outlets for expression while seeking professional support, we can help restore a sense of normalcy and trust.
